LOVE, AND SOLITUDE IN THE TIME OF CORONAVIRUS

Love And SolitudeThe more things change, the more they stay the same.

According to the dictionary this proverb means:

“Turbulent changes do not affect reality on a deeper level other than to cement the status quo.”

Well, I do not know if this apply also to this crisis, since its the first time on my life I am forced to a quarantine, however being somewhat in age, and living by myself for a quarter of a Century, I believe loneliness, doesn’t affect me on a special way, rather more like an inconvenience, not to be able to run errands, and go to eat outside the house, and of course getting my favorite coffee drink, and seat at a coffee house, a pleasure that I indulge for many years now, a few days a week.

Seating At a Coffee House

A leisurely activity that I miss a bit, but that if not struck by the virus, and gone tomorrow, hope I will enjoy once again, in the future.

I guess for the social types, like extroverted characters, these conditions may be harder to bear, extroverts are often described as talkative, sociable, action-oriented, enthusiastic, friendly, and out-going.

I know, I got brothers, and a daughter who fit the mold, now I smile when at a very young age was determined to live by myself, growing up in a home were everybody including my parents were extroverted, it was just simply exhausting for me. Of course at the time couldn’t understand why I was different, neither my family.

Playful Games All Over The House

Now, do not misunderstand, I had a happy childhood, and I also participated playing, but more often than not, I rather will be seating and reading by myself, I got to be an expert to focus my attention to my book, and ignore the noise around me.

School also was a problem, a big one, but despite the noise, and all the mayhem that a classroom without a teacher present becomes, also made good friends, but looking back most of those friends were somewhat introverted, and the kind of guy who enjoyed a more relevant type of conversation, rather than play, and general hubbub.

Child Reading

It took me sometime to clear out of jobs who enforced a daily contact with many people, even if I can say when it come to work I always got high marks, in whatever I did, but now looking back and knowing myself better, can clearly see how certain jobs I enjoyed more than others.

When computers arrived at the workplace, I worked for several companies were even in a crowded place, I had the privacy of my cubicle to concentrate on what I was doing, in a few months, I invariably became at the highest top category of producers. And companies will be sad to let me go when finding a more lucrative job.

Working Alone With Many Others My last and final job  had nothing to do with computers, but it was a small environment, with about seven people, and at least five of them were no doubt introverted, quiet characters, who you could have great conversations, during the frequent  lull periods during the day, due to lack of clients. Of course we will get busy with other work, but we could work, and chat, and many clients as well, will enjoy our conversations, I could say our most frequent customers were the ones who even if doing business with us, they preferred us, to others similar businesses because our expertise, not only on matter related to our work, some of them they will even hung up around our place on their free time. They even will say something like:

“This is a place were not only you come for business, but were you can be leaving more wiser, than when you went in.”

Relaxed Shop Envirnment

Well, what we are gone to do? We may enjoy solitude or not, we all need to go out in order to live a normal life in society, the old days of living in a cave are not an option, but for a few.

A tension in the coronavirus response is that it’s so difficult to get people to accept social distancing that few want to muddle the message with worries about social isolation. But if the ultimate concern is the health and well-being of the most vulnerable, then both dangers need to be addressed.

But we’ve also entered a new period of social pain. There’s going to be a level of social suffering related to isolation and the cost of social distancing that very few people are discussing yet.

Well I hope for most of you to be safe from the pandemic decease, and free from the effects , and troubles of isolation, for all of you and your loved ones.

Keep safe, and use the phone, grab a good book, and finish work, or projects undone around the house, but above all, keep the love flowing to everyone, even if from a safe distance.

Wish the best, to all of you.

Kepp it Safe  and at a Distance

About theburningheart

Blog: KoneKrusosKronos.wordpress.com
This entry was posted in Coronavirus, Crisis, Cultural Attitudes, Inspiration, Love, Pandemic, Solitude, Uncategorized and tagged , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

69 Responses to LOVE, AND SOLITUDE IN THE TIME OF CORONAVIRUS

  1. And coming back to you. Love, hugs, and staying safe.

  2. I can understand you very well, because I don’t mind our actual situation of being closed in and I have to admit, in secret of course, that I highly enjoy reading my very exciting, interesting and highly humorous book “The slaughterhouse’s daughter” by Yaniv Iszkotits! I very much wish you good health and that you can soon go out as usual. By the way I very much like the sentence “The more things change, the more they stay the same.” Very best regards Martina from Tessin

    • theburningheart says:

      I am glad you are fine even if in forced confinement, due to this pandemic.
      Thank you for your book recommendation.
      Here its mine you may enjoy it:
      The Edge of the Nest by Christopher Cruise
      Will hope your wishes carry through, I will do my best, but here its not so easy for me to be totally isolated, living by myself I am forced to go out eventually for groceries, ordering its not easy here, on my neck of the woods.
      Best wishes and take care! 🙂

      • Your mail made me start the day in a very good way and I thank you for it. I have to tell you that some people here also have difficulties getting their food and this is not very pleasant! We do not have these problem because the farmer, where we usually buy our food has organized a home service and the town has also has a service for people over 65!
        You book recommendation is just great! First the slautherman’s daughter speaks about the same period in Belarus, the situation of the Jews, women and about the Russan armee. I have recently also taken up again the Karamazov Brothers by Dostojevski! I am certainly going to read it but first I have to finish the said book, which I am reading together with two friends and we talk about it on the phone, now that we can’t meet. You are also invited to join us:) Take care and remain healthy. Martina

      • theburningheart says:

        Well, unfortunately, here on my neck of the woods, no one have delivery service from markets, you can order food from restaurants, but that its not only expensive and many times unhealthy, since mainly fast food places offer that service.

        At the market finally are being more helpful with hand soap at entering and when leaving the place, keeping people queuing at acceptable distances, letting a restricted number of costumers enter the market to avoid crowds.

        I am glad you are happy, I just got that book, and just start to read it, and so far I am enjoying it, the book was recommended by my friend Bob in LA, he and his wife enjoy Literature, and have high standards when recommending books, they both read a lot, and when we met over 25 years ago, it was because he was reading a book I just finish reading at the time, we have been very good friends since.
        Thanks Martina, keep in touch. 🙂

      • I am sorry that your actual situation really seems to be unpleasant. I have now planted all kinds of vegetable, which makes us more indipendent in the future. Next week the old people in our region will be allowed to do their shopping until 10o’clock in the morning!
        I am very pleased to read that reading books together creates has created a very long friendship:) I really have similar experiences, which give me much joy. By the way I have bought “The edge of the nest” and will start as soon as we have finished “The slaughterman’s daughter.
        Many thanks to you and I keep my fingers crossed. Martina

      • theburningheart says:

        Well, yes a little bit risky, but we take as much precaution as it’s possible.
        I am glad you guys are doing well.
        My friend Bob will be happy to hear you bought the book, you can see him here in this post I published some time ago just scroll down and you will see him seating at the Farmers Market in LA where we used to go to read, eat, and chat, about books. There you will see him with the books he was reading at the time.

        https://konekrusoskronos.wordpress.com/2016/11/14/my-friend-bob-calendars-and-the-relativity-of-systems-of-measure/

        He and Eva, his wife are now in the beginning of their 90’s and still going strong, they meet in Europe during the fifties, they were both traveling at the time all over Europe, and been together since mid 50’s, they love to read and travel and have been all over the World, just like you have. They just stop it after last year when Bob had to be hospitalized for some days in Hanoi.

        Thank you for worrying about me, you take care as well. 🙂

      • What a nice Easter story, thank you. Well, travelling was great, but one shouldn’t overdo it! Now I am going to the place you indicated here above!
        Have a good day:)

      • By the way, should you ever feel like reading “The slaughterman’s daughter”, I would very much appreciate your philosophical point of view as far as the rabbis are concerned!
        Take also care:)

      • theburningheart says:

        I look into the book, the price they want its too high, I may buy it when the book its not in such demand, however I passed the information to my friend Bob, also I gave him the address of your blog, so he may contact you.
        Will keep in touch. 🙂

      • That is very kind and take your time. Don’t make “Bob” work to hard, at his age! I will probably be able to start with The Edge Of The Nest in a week.
        We keep in touch:)

      • theburningheart says:

        Don’t worry about Bob, the old man, he’s as tough as nails!
        He is in great shape for his age, and used to carry a heavy bag full of books, lunch and whatever for miles, he never parks the car near to the Farmer’s market, so we had to walk back, and forth every time, that’s the way he keeps in shape. Plus he hikes with Eva on the hillside he lives, and let me tell you they are steep hills, and play badminton with Eva every morning.
        Take care Martina. 🙂

      • This is really a most encouraging message and proves what I have been convinced of for a long time, namely that we have to keep moving, if we want to get old !
        I am sure, that “Bob” had good influence on you too:)
        Stay healthy Martina

  3. Best wishes to you as well. Where was that last photo taken?

  4. We are indeed finding out at this time, how much our species still values social interactions and how much our society depends on such non-virtual connections. Wishing you well.

    • theburningheart says:

      Yes, specially the interaction for cooperation to help our fellow man in need.
      Wish you well too. 🙂

  5. superduque says:

    https://youtu.be/qqHVFT8MyJ4 5-G

    No es el virus, los síntomas son causados por ondas 5-G, …
    Ten cuidado con cualquier vacuna que recomienden ,,
    No es un virus sino ondas 5-G:
    It is not the virus, the symptoms are caused by 5-G waves, …
    Be careful with any vaccine they recommend ,,
    It is not a virus but 5-G waves:

  6. Don Ostertag says:

    The opening photo knocked me out. Wow! And so much of your writing sounds like my life. Stay safe.

  7. Safe stay at home, friend. We do the same here.

  8. I dare not add more than my good thought

  9. sherazade says:

    “Che tutto cambi perché tutto resti immutato” Il gattopardo di Tommaso di Lampedusa.
    In Italia terribile il numero di morti. Qui a Roma molto meglio!

    Tale care you too ❣

    Sono fortunata ho un delizioso giardino nella città e dunque mi pesa molto meno la clausura ma penso con dolore a quante persone tutte insieme in 50 metri quadri

  10. foodinbooks says:

    An excellent post and moreover, one that I can most definitely relate to. I, too, have lived alone for the vast majority of my adult life and so like you, it’s really more of an inconvenience. I really do enjoy my solitude, I have a large library of books, streaming Netflix, Amazon and Hulu, many podcasts, I love to cook and I am generally very comfortable in my own company. I do miss seeing my grandmother and my sister and socializing with friends, but beyond that and other than worry for our economy and for those on the front lines, I am actually fairly content. I agree with you that there is going to be significant fallout from the amount of social isolation we must live in, particularly for those who are extroverts but I think even for those of us who are comfortable in solitude. What I think will happen is a long-term phobia about touching others, even if we want to, because the fear of catching the virus. It makes me wonder how pandemic recovery took place in the past, particularly after the Spanish flu and the Black Plague. I always try to look at things from a historical perspective because it makes me calmer than it would if I were constantly reading the newspaper headlines…….again, a great post and very thought-provoking. I suppose the best way to try and come to terms with things is accept that every single one of us is affected and that ultimately, we are truly in this together. The survivors of this pandemic, both physically and emotionally, will certainly contribute to how society and culture heal in future years. Please stay safe and well! Your blog is one of my absolute favorites and I send you lots of well wishes. Paz y salud.

    • theburningheart says:

      Yes, we are in this one all together, introverts, or extroverts, and as you said after so many years of solitude today, some times I reason after fantasizing a love companion, how comfortably will I feel with another person, who very likely will have different behaviors, and will do things, that may produce annoyance?
      A treat as real as a dangerous virus perhaps?
      Who knows after so many years?
      I guess it’s like winning a lottery finding a suitable person, an ideal more than reality, to sum it up, we all need to be tolerant, and accept differences, but this is easier said than done, I am afraid.
      Maybe I should reread Garcia Marquez One Hundred Years Of Solitude, I hardly remember a word, or Love In The Time Of Cholera?
      Thank you dear for caring about my blog, and writing your great comment.

      For sure I will love to have some of your Natillas right now! 🙂

  11. selizabryangmailcom says:

    Very, very funny (to me) about your growing up, Burning Heart! It was exactly the same in my house! My parents were extroverted, ambitious go-getters and it seemed like every other day my mother would ask how my brother I turned out the way we were, which was the opposite of them–
    quiet, shy, preferring to be alone building models (my brother) or reading (me).

    She said it enough, in fact, that as we got older into teen years, I think we both started to develop a little bit of a complex about it, like there was something wrong with us, lol. At least she peppered it, though, with comments like we were “good people” and that’s all that mattered.

    So, yeah, for all those who are like my parents, this quarantine must be hellish. Humans are mammals, which are social creatures. It’s just nature. Hopefully most will find a way, though, to adjust, entertain themselves, stay busy. One CAN get used to anything with a little time and patience.

    Hoping you stay well and upbeat through it all!
    Thank you for your well wishes and take care.
    Stacey

    • theburningheart says:

      I guess being at the house the whole day, day after day it must feel like doing Jail time, with some comfort, to many. 🙂
      To me its more like an inconvenience, like in the piece I wrote above, of course I feel for those who are struggling, between life, and death, battling the virus, and for the people who are not only suffering relatives dying, but unemployment, and many other hardships, around the World, specially in third World countries, where need it’s great, and so urgent, and most lack a safety net.

      Upbeat not quite, but tranquil, and in peace with myself, thank you Stacey, for writing us, and tell us your experiences of growing up you, and your brother as introverts in a house with parents extroverts, to these days my parents pass away, but my brothers may not have a clue, about my behavior, when used to live with them, it’s so easy to attribute to weirdness, or call you an odd bird, but no harm done.

      Here safe on my cave, for the moment.
      Hope the best for you, and all. 🙂

  12. Ben Naga says:

    Ah yes. Childhood. NOW we understand. My mother’s favourite way to attempt to come to terms with my ‘oddness’ was to suggest that the hospital where I was born had mixed up the newborns and I was not in fact *her* child but some other woman’s. Down hill all the way since then. And books? Ah yes. Books. Far better companions than to be found at home or in school. Who am I really? I am still working on that; most other folk it seems stopped doing that years ago (if they ever began) so worthwhile conversations are both rare and highly valued. I am grateful to have discovered your WordPress site (although it was as I recall the other way round). 😀 And let’s not forget that ‘rare’ also means “Cooked just a short time so as to retain juice and redness”*

    * https://www.thefreedictionary.com/rare.

    Shine on! (Please) ❤️

    • theburningheart says:

      Well, character is destiny, in Spanish there is a saying “Genio y figura hasta la sepultura.”
      Translated freely as ‘Character, and body features, until you go to the grave.’
      Most people never bother at finding out their corresponding character type, and contemporary science dismiss such things, as generalities, but I should say knowing about who you are, it’s harmless, and fortunately being curious about those matters will not have an ill effect on you other, than not to be in accordance with it, if you do not think so.
      A simple test like Myers-Briggs can give you a profile of character, or a Natal chart made by a good Astrologer, its up to you if you if you think it was worth, or not. No different than consulting the Book of Changes.

      Thanks, and be well, Ben. 🙂

      • Ben Naga says:

        Yes, I have looked into several of these avenues of self-exploration and I shall continue exploring until I die. And probably after that. 😀

      • theburningheart says:

        I am glad you feel that way, most people question a lot of things, but the essentials, the ones that really matter. 😉

      • Ben Naga says:

        It isn’t exactly encouraged is it; in fact quite the reverse.

  13. Strange times indeed. Like you I don’t mind so much being less social, as I have never been that extroverted character. Nevertheless, I hope you will soon be out on the streets again.. Stay safe.

    • theburningheart says:

      Yes, I do not mind to be at home, I get plenty of things to keep me busy, however things over here are a little difficult, since you cannot order stuff on the phone, few business do that, or sent to you as home delivery, even the mail office were I get my deliveries its close for business, so you got to risk going out to markets, in order to get what you are missing, I do it early on the morning when most people is in bed yet, about once a week.
      Best wishes. 🙂

  14. My son says the same thing, that he is used to his own company. I say more power to you. I’m a bit of an introvert myself and I am only starting to miss my friends and family now in week 5 of self sheltering.

  15. “But above all, keep the love flowing to everyone, even if from a safe distance.”

    Those are perfect words.

    Hi. Be well.

    Neil S.

  16. J.D. Riso says:

    Who would have thought that being a natural introvert would come in handy one day?🙂 I’m very much okay with the enforced reclusion, but, like you, I do miss being free to go to a cafe or restaurant. Wishing you serenity and health.

    • theburningheart says:

      Except for going for work, and do the things you need to in order to live in society, my favorite place it’s home, a place that no matter how tired, and exhausted I may be after been depleted of energy, by a large crowd, I feel within minutes more relaxed, and at peace, so to be at home alone, is the thing that keep me going, it took me a while to figure out I was not an odd bird, its just a component of my character, that we share with other individuals, even if we are a minority.
      Best wishes to you as well. 🙂

  17. Leyla says:

    Excellent post!! Stay safe, friend

  18. equinoxio21 says:

    A great shot of Milan’s cathedral…
    and all the best back to you…

  19. I’m the same, feel some inconvenience, but it’s nothing abnormal.
    I’m careful with characterizing anybody as introvert or extrovert. I think most people are both at different age and in different life settings. True introverts are rare. I used to work in high schools for very many years and after a distance of time it’s visible that many introvert students became extrovert and very much public figures.
    Interesting how you get people to read your posts. I suppose I do not hit some nerve or something, but I can see that while there are likes, etc. hardly anybody looks at the real post. That refers to both, to lifeschool and art blog.
    Great post, enjoyed reading!

  20. theburningheart says:

    Yes, we all change with life, and experience, but those who study themselves can profit a little bit by knowing who they are.
    Character with age, and experience can be modified, and we all share common elements, within our characters, some they just posses more of some characteristics, or less depending on the individual, and that is why we sometimes say about a person:
    He/She is very well balanced.

    I never knew what a good salesman I was until later in life become one.
    Never suspected I was even one, and I become a salesman by chance, not by choice, only if I had dedicated lot of time to it.
    But alas!
    I find time too precious to waste, in order to make money.
    About my blog, few people care about reading it, but those who do bring me lot of satisfaction, so do not believe I have a magic formula.
    But the ability of the salesman lays principally in selling yourself first as a person, then the rest follows easily.
    Unfortunately you have to dedicate a lot of time to interact with fellow bloggers, and there the weakness of it, fortunately I have a little of more time at my disposal, but still nothing gets done, when I am sitting here at my PC.
    And that is the downside to it, I imagine you, working, painting, teaching, doing garden, cooking and house chores, and what else?
    Blogging it’s just another added burden.
    And the reason I appreciate your effort when you take the time to write me some lines.
    I know how your time is valuable.
    Thank you Inese! 🙂

  21. macalder02 says:

    A decir verdad yo tengo una diferencia abismal con mi manera de ser respecto de la tuya. Empezando que desde mi niñez yo fuí catalogado como un dicho muy popular en mi pueblo, era un “mataperro” o en otras palabras, inquieto y “callejero”. Las vacaciones andaba con 5 amigos inseparables (10 años) y no había lugar sin descubrir alredor del pueblo. Los tres años que estuve en el Seminario (12-13-14), fue un sufrimientos para los curas. Me escapaba del rezo de los rosarios para ir donde las monjas de la cocina (alemanas) para contarles chistes “rojos” a cambio de tortas ( el strudel de manzana era una delicia). En una excursión a una montaña, por hacer señale de humo, tipo Toro del Llanero Solitario, hice una pequeña fogata. El viento sopló al revés donde quería, e incendié una casa y un vaca de un lugareño. Tuvieron que pagar el daño los curas y a mi me regresaron a mi casa al año siguiente.
    Ahora con mis 72 años a cuesta, con la afición de lectura y amante de la música clásica (legado del Seminario) me siento bien en mi reclusión.
    Mi esposa con sus clases de gimnasia y sus lecciones de portugués (tenenemos un hijo que vive allí) online, no interferimos en disfrutar la soledad impuesta. Somos incansables conversadores y cuando nos damos cuenta, se nos consumió el tiempo.
    Tu historia, contrapuesta a la mía, me resultado por demás interesante y sobre todo, muy divertida. Sacar conclusiones de tu forma de vida, es para mi una lección que la recibo con mucha satisfacción.
    Estamos cumpliendo con las recomendaciones y aquí, en Santiago de Chile, vamos en constante aumento de contagiados pero han controlado a la población. Tenemos un toque de queda en la noche y eso ayuda a no tener gente en la callen esas horas. No sabemos cuanto vamos a durar en esto pero sabemos que es mejor que nada quedarse en casa. La salud está primero.
    Me alegro que estes bien y que realmente estes disfrutando tu confinamiento. Un gran abrazo y todo lo mejor para ti.
    Manuel

  22. theburningheart says:

    Me encanto tu relato de tus aventuras de infancia, pero no creas que mi vida fue sedentaria y aburrida, viviendo en una casa de extrovertidos.
    Algo que no detalle, en mi relato fue contar las aventuras de vivir en compañia de mis tres hermanos y las miles de peripecias y aventuras que me vi envuelto, sin contar la de los nuemerosos amigos del barrio, y la escuela, quien no recuerda las aventuras y trajines de esos años?
    Mi madre al ver la naturaleza traviesa y bullangera de mis hermanos, no le gustaba que fueramos de visita a casas ajenas, para ahorrarse las quejas de los vecinos y preferia mantenernos en casa, pero comprendiendo nuestra necesidad de amigos, eramos libres de invitar a todos nuestros amigos del barrio, por cierto bastante numerosos, a nuestra casa.
    Ella era del pensar, que al menos asi, ella se evitaria la pena de ofrecer disculpas por nuestro comportamiento y toleraba el bullicio que representa tener a una dozena o mas de niños jugando en casa.
    Afortunadamente, en las tres casas que vivimos teniamos patios muy grandes con muchos arboles y ahi se desarollaban nuestros juegos y travesuras, que era cosa de todos los dias despues de la escuela.
    Mas tarde de jovenes teniamos el mar y los cerros de alrededor, nos dio por buecear en las profundidaes, y andar como cabras por los cerros.
    Claro a medida que fui creciendo mi caracter se fue imponiendo y sali para no regresar, sino de visita desde los 17 años, viviendo a 1,816 Km de distancia mis visitas fueron poco frecuentes, pero claro ahi no acabaron mis aventuras, hasta que consegui vivir por mi propia cuenta, cosa que me llevo tres, o cuatro años.
    Y claro despues vinieron trabajo, tres matrimonios y familias.
    Pero eso es otra Historia, donde tambien peque y pague por mi ignorancia.
    Pero como platico me llevo un tiempo entender mi caracter, y porque preferia la tranquilidad, que el bullicio alrededor de mi, simplemente a las personas introvertidas nos fatiga, y necesitamos de silencio y soledad para recuperar energia.
    Y como tenemos una imaginacion muy rica, eso nos da oportunidad para desarrollar la lectura y la escritura, y otro tipo de actividades donde puedas concentrarte sin distraer tu atencion, como en trabajos minuciosos, donde requieres concentrar tu atencion, para poder ejecutarlos efectivamente.
    Y por lo tanto estar solos no significa soledad, sino libertad para seguir nuestros habitos favoritos.

    Gracias Manuel por tus confidencias.

    Si bien se que esta quarentena, sera una prueba para la paciencia de muchos, tambien sera un periodo, de fructividad para aquellos que se apliquen en resolver problemas en casa.

    Saludos un abrazo y cuidate, suerte! 🙂

    • theburningheart says:

      Gracias, conozco muy bien el problema, incluso trabaje para la Industria Farmaceutica algunos años. 🙂

  23. da-AL says:

    much appreciate your insights. stay safe & happy 🙂

  24. ptero9 says:

    Although I do worry about elderly parents getting the virus, I’m fine with spending time at home in a quiet environment. Glad you are doing well!
    Debra

    • theburningheart says:

      Well, since we are forced to be alone, its not a big deal to me, since many years I have live by myself, merely a nuisance, when forced to go out like grocery shopping, where I live its not available.
      Neither I can visit friends, or do activities like socializing, go to services a different churches, or teaching as I was doing, I guess if we survive this crisis it will pass, as everything else.

      I am glad you are fine as well, blessings. 🙂

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